Posts Tagged ‘family’
A brief hometown visit
I’ve suddenly disappeared from regular activities in Auckland this coming week – but don’t be alarmed!
I’m sitting in a gate lounge waiting for a flight to My hometown of Kuching, Malaysia.
I haven’t been back since 2006, when my mother passed away. This time round I’m off to look after my father who’s a bit worse for wear with an unresolved illness. With grace, I’ll be able to help improve his condition and facilitate some of his business affairs so that he’s able to fly back and join the concerned Chong clan in Auckland.
It’s a patient and hopeful wait.
In the meantime, allow me to use some of my free time over the next few days to introduce you readers to Kuching, the township I was born in.
Take care everyone.
Year in Review 2008
This year I’ve grown taller.
It’s mainly as a result of wearing shoes to work. When I take them off I am my normal height, and my normal self. In 2008 I chose to start a career, and it’s been a year of learning, phone calls, research and writing, business meetings, commuting.
This year I spent 20,000 km in traffic. And about 500 hours listening to equal parts stilted conversation, heartfelt fellowship, irate talkback, devotional nudgings, head-banging tracks.
This year I left New Zealand. But then I came back. The trans-Tasman travel I’ve done this year has been purely work-related. It’s almost like a cheap thrill – perhaps less cheap and more thrill – to fly on account of someone’s credit card. It’s almost like a free gift, grace.
This year my sister joined me in the amazing race. I’m still buzzing about it.
This year I started a countdown. Today it’s at 402. And when it counts down, there’s a cord of three waiting; my best friend will become my best friend with a different name.
She’s the love for a lifetime.
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This year was filled with new experiences. A new job. A new church. A renewal of my walk with God.
This year I ran my heart out. It was hard, but it was good. I made new friends, both online and offline. I kept old friends close, or at least tried to. Sometimes you have to accept that you’re thereabouts, but not in there.
I went tramping, and fell in love with New Zealand all over again.
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And now, for a Special Paperclip section!
Open with care: fragile! And thanks for the dinners and the everything.
As a reminder to how we’ve changed through the ‘ears:
LIST OF PREVIOUS Y/EAR IN REVIEWS
Dennis/Ethan 2005
Ethan Waters 2006/07
Ethan Waters 2007/08
Ethan Waters 2008
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Happy New Year everyone; thanks for reading and sharing life together!
Canyoning through grief
On the 16th April 2008, most of New Zealand woke up to nonstop coverage of a horrible tragedy – 6 students and 1 teacher from Elim Christian College were killed when overcome by a flash flood in the Mangatepopo River.
How does a Christian come to terms with losing someone they love? Why did these 7 die and not someone else? What was the plan behind it? Is an accident like this punishment from God, or nothing to do with Him? How much control did He exert on the events that took place? I don’t think there are any easy answers.
The best book I could recommend is Philip Yancey’s “Where is God when it hurts?“. It pulls no punches, and it’s honest in saying that no-one can fully understand why the things happen as they do. But it offers a comforting perspective on pain and suffering.
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While the circumstances surrounding the loss may vary, there’s a sombre sense of similarity in the questions that flooded my mind around the time my mother passed away. How did I react when faced with these questions?
- I grieved. It didn’t matter that I was thrown back into friends and family, traditions and rituals I didn’t understand or affiliate with. I was there, I cried and shared in the sorrow of my brothers and sisters, my dad, my relatives.
- I regretted. Times when I could have been a better son. Times when I said and did things which I didn’t mean. Promises that never came true. Hopes and dreams that remain unfulfilled.
- I doubted. One question I posed to my brother sounded a bit like this: “If I believe in God, will I see her again?” No one can tell me that their faith is not shaken when bad things happen to good people. Even though I knew that God doesn’t change, I still struggled. I questioned why my mother couldn’t have come to known Christ. I didn’t like the answers to my questions. I struggled to accept His plan.
- I was comforted. Many of the Psalms deals with suffering and trusting in God in times of happiness, and times of sorrow. Psalm 23 is beautiful, and comforts me. “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Even though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; though its waters roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with its swelling.” (Ps 46:1-3).
It’s hard to look back, because you see things that you can’t change besides your own thoughts and perspectives on what, why, and to what end. Pain and suffering? It’s a part of this fallen world. In Philip Yancey’s book, he says: “I hope I do not so insulate myself from pain that I do not feel pleasure.”
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One thing that these seven were able to cling to: the promise of eternity spent with God. As Christians, perhaps part of you looks forward to the time when you will go to be with the Lord. I recently heard a Sovereign Grace Music song that seems to really drive it home…
“It is not death to die,
to leave this weary road
and join the saints who dwell on high
who’ve found their home with God.
It is not death to close
the eyes long dimmed by tears
And wake in joy before your throne
delivered from my fears…”
The best thing we can do in response? Perhaps it’s just to pray for God’s comfort and shelter for these families and friends. We may not know them directly, or well. But I think each of us can do something about it, no matter how small it seems.
Suffering reminds us that we live in a less-than-perfect world. The circumstances of our suffering is not up to us. Whether we draw closer to or away from the Lord because of it, however, is up to us.
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“The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised” (Job 1:21).
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first-rate family
Korean plums. Hot bubble milk tea. Blogging at work. Life is a diaspora of edible things and credible thoughts.
On Wednesday I had the misfortune of rolling my ankle while running down a hill searching for the next control. I managed to still lose to Leo, but Jared and Kristy tried out o’teering for the first time, which I think they enjoyed.
Went to Alicia’s birthday bash at Sixth Sense - being sociable, catching up with other people. Rainbow decided she wouldn’t like to be a flight attendant now that she’s been unsuccessful twice. Logan’s at animation school, May’s in her job for the benefits, and Joel wore a half-cowboy hat.
Paperclip was good – just sat around and chatted with Sonny and Dennis. One of the things about working as a writer is that you’re in mostly solitary mode through the week, except for the odd meeting or chat. So scheduling time to see friends and family is still paramount.
My dad came and went this time round. It’s good that we’ve moved on from our previous misunderstandings about his not-so-new relationship with Jennifer, and in any case life just goes on. I think the struggle now is trying to fathom why my mother doesn’t burn in my heart as strongly as before, and whether that’s a good or a bad thing.
2 years on and look where everyone is.
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Kelly O’Connor from the Rational Response Squad once said in a TV debate, “I’d rather go to hell than worship a megalomaniacal tyrant God.”
The last I heard, He took the fall for us – is that so tyrannical?
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Lanterns and life
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Some tidbits:
- Kim is learning to drive. And pretty well too, I might add – getting the hang of turns and corners and hills and valleys and parking.
- Richard had a blast in Tokyo. I still haven’t seen pictures, so I wonder if it was all a dream, or a conspiracy theory (like those people that believe the Apollo moon landings were fake).
- Haven’t done too much music aside from Saturday classes. Life is quite busy, it’s fair to say I haven’t been able to be totally selfish for awhile. Still deciding if it’s a good or a bad thing in the long-term, but so far so good.
- Having no homework is great. Don’t miss uni life. I can leave my work at the office, and so in the evenings and the weekends I can focus on things at home, catching up with friends, going out to dinner, etc.
Hopefully we can start up a weekly family dinner.
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Auckland: Part Je’Taime, Part Eclipse
You know,
I’ve been back in Auckland for two weeks. Settling into the double, no quadruple life as a medical writer, violinist, songwriter, and maitre d’ of the home (at least until Richard returns on the 24th.)
Some highlights:
- Running under an eclipsed sky in Cornwall Park, chasing for the control I need
- The dezoning nature of long summer evenings spent on a congested motorway
- Dinner dates with my sister over gentle Mando-pop
- Reading AJ Jacob’s interesting, thought-provoking Biblical living book (makes you question literalism)
- Friends and family, ebbing and flowing
Anyways, will try to update when I have the time. Not dead! Not dead!
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